The Micronesian Question

On Tuesday my class, “Contemporary Pacific Poetry and Poetics” (with my instructor Craig Santos Perez, Chamorro poet activist and scholar) finally got to the section on Micronesian Poetry. Our assignments to prepare for that section was to

1. Read Pohnpeian poet Emelihter Kihleng’s book “My Urohs” http://www.amazon.com/My-Urohs-Emelihter-Kihleng/dp/0979378834,
2. Read her poem “The Micronesian Question” http://tinfishpress.com/?page_id=512
3. Watch this  video: [vimeo http://vimeo.com/42044060] which is called “Micronesians Abroad,” a film produced by the Micronesian Seminar:http://www.micsem.org/video/videotapes/49.htm.

As a Marshallese raised in Hawaii, I know all about the “Micronesians Abroad” experience. And ever since I came out with my youtube video “Lessons from Hawaii”

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sbtpazYra0],

I’ve placed myself into the stream of discussion about racism against Micronesians in Hawai’i. I feel like I’ve had this discussion so much, that it’s just ingrained in me. Which is why a small part of me was still a little shocked when I heard one of my classmates admit that they had no idea this was a problem that actually existed.

So first and foremost – yes racism against Micronesians in Hawai’i exists. It’s wrong. It’s not right. And it has had an incredibly damaging effect on my community.

When I first came to Hawai’i, I didn’t know I was inferior – but I soon learned to adopt that mindset. I was told to speak more English. I was made fun of for my accent. I was always left out, for reasons I couldn’t fully grasp. Teachers were constantly surprised at my ability to succeed. I was told I wasn’t Marshallese – that Micronesian was easier to understand. I was the only Micronesian in my entire school, and there were cultural markers about me that separated me. I felt like “the other” without really being able to articulate what that meant.

My cousins in public schools had it way worse. They were spit on in hallways, jumped in the corners, pulled into fights, bullied and harassed. My cousin was placed in English as a Second Language class for an entire year, without any questions asked, before her teacher finally realized she could actually speak fluent English.

And this is just scratching the surface. There is an institution of racism against us that exists, that I soon became aware of through newspapers, and overhearing heating discussions from the adults around me. Newspaper headlines that shamed us – “Micronesians Fill Homeless Shelters” “Micronesians Run Hefty Health Care Tabs.” When a Micronesian boy was cornered by a group of his peers and took out a knife to defend himself, the media and overall reaction focused not on the fact that this was one kid being targeted by a group, but that he was Micronesian and was wielding a knife – thus another stereotype – the knife-wielding Micro.

We seem to be the problem that needs fixing.

Within all of these discussions that centered around “The Micronesian Problem,” our voices were generally absent, deemed unnecessary. And so our history was also ignored. A history that explained our need for migration and survival, a history of colonization, dispossession, and war – which left our countries crippled. This racism is also portrayed in how we’ve been revoked rights to healthcare benefits that we need to simply live.

This is an article where I was interviewed recently, which explains some of that history, along with the history of civil rights struggle since:

http://www.aljazeera.com/humanrights/2013/10/micronesians-hawaii-face-uncertain-future-201310191535637288.html

When I came out with my video poem, I basically exploded into this discussion, and became a public voice for this debate. My friends who helped me produce this video at the Fourth Branch all knew that this poem would be pretty controversial – some people might get it, some people might not. One thing’s for sure – the poem is angry, visceral, and in-your-face. I know this. But this is how I felt. This was – is – my true story. And I wanted more people to talk about this issue – because it felt like it was the elephant in the room. And I honestly feel that if we don’t talk about it – we’ll never heal. We’ll never move past it. And I didn’t want that kind of hatred to live in other Micronesian kids raised in Hawai’i – the way it lived inside of me for so long. I didn’t want them to hate their own culture, or lose their language and connection to their homeland, because of this hatred.

After this poem came out, I got requests to perform it at other places – at UH Hilo for a conference on pacific islanders in higher education, and also at UH Manoa, Chaminade and high school classrooms where people were learning and talking about this issue. Because of this poem, people have facebook messaged me, emailed me, found this blog. They’ve written to tell me their stories – how they’ve been judged in their workplaces, overheard coworkers making fun of Micronesians when they didn’t know their audience included a Micronesian, how they were always looked down on in school, how they got bullied by teachers, how this story resonated with them and moved them. They’ve hugged me after my performances, they’ve even cried during my performances. Each interaction is humbling, and gratifying. It tells me that my decision to put out this poem, to write this poem, was the right decision.

At the same time, however, these experiences can also be draining. It opens old wounds. Just when I figured that I’ve put that trauma behind me, someone comes up to me and tells me about their friends who hate other Micronesians, about their family members who discourage them from dating a Micronesian boy, they ask about why other Micronesian families seem to just drink and do nothing. I hear these stories, these questions, and I always try my best to stay patient, to listen and understand that all they’re trying to do is understand as well. But it hurts. Every time. It brings me back to my own past traumas every time.

At class we discussed how Emelihter’s poem and my poem are super raw, angry, and in-your-face. One of my classmates asked if we felt that this was an appropriate way to facilitate discussions, if this is the right approach.

My response was that yes – it had to happen. We needed to shatter the façade that this sort of behavior is tolerable and okay – that it doesn’t incite rage, hurt, betrayal in our people. So yes, I stand by Emelihter’s poem and my poem.

However, I also believe that now that we’ve created the space to start talking, that it’s time to keep moving forward and to begin a process of conversations between ourselves and the communities we’ve come to live with. It’s time to begin a process of healing. So the next Micronesian Question should be: what’s the next step?

The fight for civil rights isn’t over. If you go to the COFACAN website http://www.healthypacific.org/1/post/2013/06/convening-for-justice-cofa-can-meeting-this-saturday-june-8-kkua-kalihi-valley.html, you can find out more about what needs to be done so that Micronesians can receive access to the same health care benefits amongst other things, and why this is necessary and why we more than deserve it. This is definitely an integral part of the next step.

Frrom my work with other indigenous activists – Hawaiians and Chamorros, especially, I also have begun to reconsider another part of the next step – our role as immigrants to the indigenous communities whose land we’ve settled on as well. Our communities have been fighting for so long that we’ve forgotten that there’s a common enemy, that we have a shared history of colonization. How do we look at the bigger picture? What can we do to help our Pacific Islander brothers and sisters who have lost their lands? How do we support them, and have them support us?

I have no answers for these questions, but they’re all different facets  to the other Micronesian Questions out there.

I left class with wounds reopened, but also with a determination to move forward. There is more than one Micronesian Question that we’ll have to answer – and it’s time to consider all the different layers to this issue.